Since Exodus
International, the religious umbrella group for ex-gay ministries, said it
would nolonger try to “cure” homosexuality it caused a split in the ex-gay world.
In Australia, LibertyChristian Ministries and Living Waters have sided with the old
school approach and holding on to their guns preaching change is possible. "Look
at me" the leaders say, "I am married, I have children".
One of the things
that came out of the ex-gay “rift” was evidence that Joseph Nicolosi, founder
of the pseudo scientific organisation NARTH (National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuality)
, usespornography in his “therapy”. This is used to supposedly help clients
“imagine” having different attractions. This is quite feasible as I know of gay
guys from Christian backgrounds who have tried to do the same themselves and
also know of pastors and parents who suggested hiring a female prostitute would
help them. Nicolosi rebuffedthe claims saying that he used gay
porn to desensitize clients and that he
"uses pictures of women they find
attractive in mainstream magazines and we work on developing a physical
attraction to them, through their imagination".
NARTH also posted an article by Nicolosi about “overcominggay pornography” that demonstrates the organization’s twisted and unrealistic understanding of sexuality.
According to
Nicolosi, gay men are drawn to gay porn because it fulfils three “emotional
needs”. These emotional needs, Nicolosi claims, are the result of compromised
masculinity which is causing them to be gay.
Firstly gay men watch
gay porn because of "body envy", as they feel inadequate in comparison
to the porn actors’ “muscularity, body hair, large build, and the archetypal
image of masculinity, a large penis.”
The second, Nicolosi
proposes, is an assertive attitude, in which gay men are drawn to the
“directness, non-inhibition, and bold aggression” of the porn actors. And
thirdly he suggests “vulnerable sharing,” because gay men are attracted to the
“open sharing of emotions” portrayed when two men are together.
Simply put, Nicolosi
believes all gay men are emotionally weak, body-conscious cowards and are
desperate for loving attention from other men. Nicolosi's solution? Make some friends and those three
needs will be met.
Nicolosi's twisted
views on homosexuality produce weird theories and practices and misses the very
simple fact. Gay men are attracted to
gay porn because they are same sex oriented.This is the way their brains and
hormones are wired. Trying to desensitize them to their natural same sex
attraction or showing them images of the opposite sex is crazy crazy stuff.
Nicolosi's clients are closeted, tormented people
who are troubled by the same sex attraction because of either religious beliefs,
family pressure or both. In the 50's, 60's and early 70's mental health
professionals came up with all kinds of theories and therapies to try 'cure'
people of their homosexuality. Aversion therapies, injections, electric shock
treatments and lobotomies were just some. At that time, the pressure to change
came from society who viewed homosexuality as an illness and crime. The
draconian practices of the 50's, 60's
and early 70's never worked. All mental health professional organisations
through to the World Health Organisation have not only moved on but rejected
change/conversion/reparative type "therapies".
As
long as there are out-dated religious beliefs, family and society pressures to
conform and general ignorance about sexual orientation, ex-gay organisations
will continue to promote their twisted theories that play on vulnerable people.
Thankfully our societies are changing in western countries to more enlightened
understandings of sexuality. Unfortunately, in the mean time, they cause untoldharm to people trouble believing they have unwanted same sex attraction. To
say nothing of the wasted years and money.
© Anthony Venn-Brown
Twitter: @gayambassador
Website: www.gayambassador.com
Email: info@gayambassador.com
Anthony Venn-Brown is the co-founder and former leader of Freedom2b, Australia’s largest network of LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender) people from Christian backgrounds. He is also an educator and consultant on LGBT/faith issues and leader in deconstructing the ‘ex-gay’ myth. Anthony’s autobiography 'A Life of Unlearning', details his journey from married, high profile preacher in Australia’s mega-churches to living as an openly gay man. Anthony has been twice voted ‘One of the 25 Most Influential Gay and Lesbian Australians’ (2007 & 2009) and was one of four finalists for the 2011 ACON Community Hero Award. He is also the founder and director of Ambassadors & Bridge Builders International.
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